Often we decide to control…either a situation, ourselves, or someone else. We usually feel our intention is to help, but sadly it is seen as an intrusion on either a situation or to someone else.
Controlling usually (and eventually) leads to resentment by others; they may not see it that way at first, as many of us can attest to someone seeming to WANT us to have control over a situation, or even them because they don’t wish to ‘consciously’ be responsible for a decision), but sadly, once we do ‘control’, anger and resent usually/eventually follow.
It is said that someone whom controls always feels ‘out of control,’ so that they have a need to control everyone and everything. But it goes so much deeper than that, for on a metaphysical level, control is actually stopping oneself from experiencing life to it’s fullest, and not for the reason one may think!
We tend to view controlling people as that they always want their way, and while that may appear to be true, the truth is this: The only one that they are truly ‘controlling,’ (not giving their way to..) is THEMSELVES. This is a great truth because there is none other THAN YOU! There is only ONE BEING sitting here, split into countless units of Energy called Souls, and so, to control another is to really control SELF; in this case, stopping oneself, hindering oneself, not allowing oneself to evolve or grow!
When observing a person who controls, (we may sometimes use the word, “control-freak…”) we often think that they should just mind their own business; we perceive them as that they are not allowing the other to realize something essential in their life situation. They are either over-protecting, being intrusive, or worst yet, manipulating that individual into living their dreams, rather than realizing their own; in other words, they are stopping that person from experiencing life! And what of a person that controls? They actually are not experiencing/enjoying their own life. They become so involved in the other’s life or in a situation, that they are not free. They are always concerned, complaining or judging a situation or person, and usually refuse to look at their own life.
To be involved so deeply in another’s life story is detrimental not only to that person, but to oneself, for someone who controls robs (not only the one whom they are controlling), but also themselves of freedom and joy.
The best way to perceive anyone is to remember, ‘they were God’s child, before they were mine…’ and in that stillness, the control is lifted, freeing both the controlled, and especially, the one controlling.
And isn’t this the exact definition of God/Love, which is to allow FREE WILL? Love is truly allowing others to be free; and in Loving ourselves, we then also choose freedom in letting go of controlling those around us.
As we stop controlling others, we gain and experience our own freedom, which is another word for God, and the experience of being THAT.
Blessings!
